Today is Pride here in Leeds. I almost said Gay Pride, but that isn’t accurate. In the present-day media, the word ‘gay’ has been erased and replaced with ‘queer’, which is bizarre as that term was and still is a slur. Can you imagine the same happening for any other group?

I started telling people I was gay (as opposed to the ritualistic and narcissistic practice of ‘coming out’) in the mid-90s. One of the things that stopped me going onto the gay scene after I had moved to London to attend university was the same as what prevented me from attending Pride— tribalism and conformity. Just because I had made public that I was gay, I wasn’t going to grow a moustache and wear a plaid shirt with double denim. I wasn’t going to give up my individuality and assimilate. 

In fact, I did start going onto the gay scene of London and had a wonderful time but without pledging my allegiance to being either a clone, twink, or bear. This was the era in which homophobia was still the default position in society. There was still progress to be made.

But what happens when that longed for moment comes and homophobia, by and large, becomes as outdated as Britpop, Cool Britannia, and rave culture? I still remember the moment when I realised that the straights were fully onboard with the gays. It was when I was scrolling through Facebook and I saw that I was the only person on my timeline who hadn’t used the rainbow filter on their profile picture and uploaded the results. I quickly remedied this by finding a picture of Tom Cruise and John Travolta together and using the filter on that instead. A few friends got the joke.

Douglas Murray in his brilliant book, The Madness of Crowds, wondered what happens when St George has conquered the dragon and has no more battles to fight. This was the crossroads us gays were at on that particular day whilst I was scrolling through social media.

There were one of two roads that were laid out in front of us. One was to live our best lives and fully enjoy our anonymous places in society. But the other was to pretend that the non-existent LGBT community has never had it so bad and to blend exhibitionism with narcissism and victimhood. This is where the Pride month folly is now. Myself and my friends who just happen to also be gay wouldn’t be seen dead at a Pride parade.

In the words of the ever brilliant Morrissey, ‘It says nothing to me about my life’. The news items covering Pride that make me shudder always focus on the drag queens, those wearing rainbow-coloured sequinned jockstraps or those who identify as ‘furries’ (in the words of Catherine Tate’s Ray and Janice – ‘Don’t ask!’) The gays who recognise that they are fully accepted by wider society and don’t have to go onto a niche scene consisting of pubs and clubs with blacked-out windows anymore don’t feel the need to parade and ‘be seen’. The more attention-seeking do. Pride these days is for the narcissistic, those who think they look great dressed as a dog (they don’t) and those straight people who either identify as ‘queer’ or are so backwards that they think this freakshow actually represents the LGBT+ community and have brought their kids along (I shuddered whilst I typed that). This has very dark undertones as numerous convictions of prominent Pride organisers will attest such as Stephen Ireland, a founder of Surrey Pride.

And so a new, updated brand of homophobia for the 2020s creeps in. The straights who want some attention and so identify as ‘queer’ (again, a slur) once all of the heavy lifting has been done in decades gone by with much blood, sweat and tears being shed along the way, the representation of the (imaginary) LGBT+ community by the lunatics who have taken over the asylum, the utterly vile trans ideology with its puberty blockers, medical pathways and ‘transing the gay away’. This veers from defamatory to downright criminal for those gay people who just want to live their lives.

I read a local news item on this year’s Pride with one (self-appointed) spokesman saying that ‘Pride has always been a protest’. He then conveniently forgot to specify what is being protested, which rights they are trying to fight for. In fact, he then goes on to say that the parade is so urgently needed as it provides much-needed visibility for the community. Excuse me?! Over the last few years, we’ve seen Pride become a monthly event, more commonly a bi (pun not intended) monthly event (depending on if a town or city’s parade is booked for June or July and if Sonia or Nikki French is available). The media has also been awash with rainbow flags for seemingly years now, whether their inclusion has been appropriate or not. If not, they’ll still be crowbarred in somehow. My favourite example was seeing a rainbow flag on the side of a fire engine. ‘Fire doesn’t discriminate. Neither do we’ was the slogan accompanying it. I remember the dark days when you were asked your sexual orientation when reporting a fire, with a wrong answer resulting in no fire engines being dispatched at all. Terrible times but remedied with this new rainbow-coloured motif. Thanks, North Yorkshire Fire Service.

Another reason for all of this rainbow-coloured bombardment that we’ve suffered during the last decade is also due to capitalism and advertising. All things Pride are used to hock stuff, from t-shirts in Primark, sarnies in M&S, and greetings cards in Card Factory. Sainsburys even have their own slot in the schedule for Leeds Pride. Certain retailers see Pride Month a lot like Valentine’s Day, Easter, or Christmas in that they can flog stuff and put up seasonal displays.

The fact that extra letters are also included in the ever-growing rainbow people acronym is also having a negative effect. Gay and Lesbian became LGBT, which then gradually morphed into LGBTQIA2S+. I’ve probably missed some letters, numbers, or symbols. Some have probably been added during the writing of this article.

But there is light at the end of the tunnel. Have you noticed that the rainbow flag, Pride nonsense has decreased this year? A lot of companies and advertisers are backing away as demand is on the wane. Although I’m sure there are those who think they can possibly use furries, leather daddies, and those wearing rubber dog masks to advertise their wares. A recent example is the advertising campaign by food company Hello Fresh, who chose Pride Month to inform everyone that their nutritious food is high in fibre, which is perfect for Pride Month. Yes, it’s what you think it is! There were those who clutched their pearls at this, but I thought it was brilliant. They made gay people sexual again rather than pink, fluffy and asexual (the complete opposite of most Grindr-surfing homosexuals).

Those companies who are pushing Pride and rainbow flags as heavily as during years before are starting to look hopelessly out of date and behind the times. The companies who are tiptoeing away have realised that the gays (as opposed to the narcissists and nutjobs) live just like everyone else and will buy a certain brand of cornflakes just as they are and without a rainbow banner on the box.

Which raises the question— if gay men and lesbians have equality, why are we being othered with rainbow flags and Pride parades? Consign these to the historical bin. I’d much prefer a Gay and Lesbian History Month. But, again, there’s work to be done with this also. Revisionism of history and cultural gaslighting needs to be called out regarding our history. It wasn’t all Marsha P. Johnson, Sylvia Rivera, or Miss Majors. But that’s a discussion for another time.